hey Morven, you're crackin' you are

I’m sitting here trying to write a Twilight Zone-esque monologue for a project at work, looking up hotel deals for the long weekend on the internet, checking my e-mail, helping customers (because I am at work), and eating a granola bar. Multi-tasking. Everyone thinks that multi-tasking is such a great skill, that it’s the essential tool for success. I disagree. If your doing more than one thing at a time than how can you be fully engaged in any task? Do we really listen to our friends when we wash dishes while talking on the phone? Do we really speak from the heart when we e-mail from work amidst the bustle and the watchful eyes of our supervisors? We need to become more involved. We need to spend each moment actually in the moment. In my humble opinion, anyway.

Shyness.

Yesterday, as I was walking home form the grocery store I imagined falling into another world. I was walking through the forest trail behind my house and as the sunlight filtered in through the trees I shut my eyes and felt transported into a new place. This world was fashioned after medieval times, but with none of the dirt or disease. It was filled with heroes on horseback, and I was one of them. An elven acrobat with neutral alignment and a beautiful white stallion named Okesat. Completely free I traveled this vast world meeting new people in new villages and spending weeks at a time alone in the mountains. To take my imagining further I imagined myself a sorceress with powers to tame wild beasts and alter the weather. I was an outstanding sword fighter and with my acrobatic skills could outplay any opponent without harming them in any way, save for their pride. In this world I was immortal. The keeper of all time and history and forever alone.

Today it felt like I was in control of everything. The radio played the right songs at the right time to drive me into nostalgia. I felt like I could feel time whipping past me like strands of hair in a convertible. It seemed as though I could recall every moment that I’ve lived so far and it was so overwhelmingly beautiful. All of it, so beautiful.

Aujourd'hui il s'est senti comme j'étais dans la commande de tout. La radio a joué les bonnes chansons à l’exact temps pour me conduire ver la nostalgie. Je me suis senti comme je pourrais sentir le temps fouettant après moi comme des rives des cheveux dans une auto ouverte. Il a semblé comme si je pourrais rappeler chaque moment que j'ai vécu jusqu'ici et il était tellement, primordialement beau. Si beau.

Sometimes we need to hang on to things that aren’t real just to keep from falling.